Ambiguous Blogging

It’s been nearly a month since I blogged last, which is rare. But I went from musical tech week to musical performance week to Daylight Saving Time to Parent-Teacher Conferences, and here it is, the Ides of March and I’m dizzy from the past three weeks.

It’s also hard for me to blog when I can’t–or don’t–want to write about what’s really on my mind, which is where I find myself today.

Suffice it to say that between uncertainty at work, people around me suffering unimaginable pain, and a continued lack of personal life, I have plenty of reasons to crawl back in bed and ignore everything and everyone.

But life usually doesn’t afford that kind of opportunity, does it? I have a job where I like to believe my students actually need me…most days. I have responsibilities at church that require me to show up. I have family who, even when I feel emotionally raw, still wants me around.

So I dragged myself to church today and taught a lesson that was, in part, about burdens, and I tried not to cry or to choke on the irony of what I was teaching. I have a collection of items to take to my parents, and today’s as good a day as any. I have digital stacks of papers to grade and lessons to plan, and food to prepare for the coming week.

Life goes on.

Routine makes it possible.

Love makes it endurable.

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