In 2002, I watched a program on Bravo where various musicians covered obscure Broadway songs. That was an emotional school year–the year of the 9/11 attacks, the year of the car accident that should’ve killed me, the year of the Salt Lake City Olympics, the year of my roommates getting engaged, the year of moving back to Nebraska.
I can’t remember at what point of the school year I watched the Bravo program, but in the past thirteen years I haven’t been able to forget Shawn Colvin’s cover of “Try to Remember” from The Fantasticks. I remember this much about watching it: I was sitting on the fluffy green couch, a blanket draped over my legs, and after the first line of the song, dissolving into tears and eventually sobs.
It was so cathartic, post-9/11, post car accident (I’ve been unable to separate those two events), to sit on a couch and hear a hauntingly beautiful song and just sob. Rational or not, I felt a great deal of survivor’s guilt from my accident, undoubtedly because of all those who were not spared just four days prior.
It’s been just an emotionally taxing start to this school year, and listening to this song again today, I’m transported to different Septembers–some good, some bad–and thinking of how I can recapture the good Septembers and follow, follow….