Not going into details, but suffice it to say that at the end of the day today, I was hurt, sad, angry, and near tears.
When I feel like this, I’m glad I don’t have kids of my own–if kids I care about so much at school can hurt me so deeply, how would I feel if my own flesh and blood treated me the same?!
Also, when I feel like this, I get angry at every ex-boyfriend I’ve ever had, because if just one of them had married me, I probably wouldn’t be here. Sure, I would likely be dealing with a completely different set of problems, and on days like today, that set of problems looks pretty appealing.
So it was in this state that I arrived at my piano lessons, upset and despondent, and then I looked at the yard. Tulips everywhere. Red ones, yellow ones, dozens of my favorite flowers. A small thing, yes, but on days like todays, it feels more like one of God’s tender mercies.
And then when I returned to school to supervise newspaper work session, a former student was there. I’m not sure why, to be honest, but he stayed for about an hour, chatting with me and letting me show off the work my newspaper staff had done. His visit was a small thing, but felt more like one of God’s tender mercies too.
Then several editors showed up and worked for over two hours on the newspaper. I have to say–this issue is pretty amazing. Kids are taking risks and showing creativity that I didn’t know they had. It’s fun to watch, and while I’m waaaaay behind on grading, watching those kids work felt like one of God’s tender mercies.
And now I’m home–I have ice cream, I have NCIS, I have a bed I adore and a decent Internet connection. Yeah, today my job kinda sucked. But I also felt that today, God had my back a little.