“So Rowse, what’s going on in your love life?” a friend asked me today at lunch.
If she hadn’t just moved back to Nebraska, I would have bristled at her question. But we haven’t had time to catch up, so I just told her the truth.
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”
She seemed a little shocked at first, but I could tell she was on a fishing expedition with her follow-up:
“Can I set you up? What are you looking for in a guy?”
My other friends all piped in: “A pulse! Breathing!” and we laughed. And the first word out of my mouth should have been “LDS.” But it wasn’t. And I don’t mean to disparage LDS guys (or maybe I do), but here’s my greatest hits of dating only LDS guys:
*Told me he wasn’t sure he was ready to commit (heard this one A LOT); a year later he “accidentally” took me to pick up the engagement ring he would give to the woman who is now his wife.
*Told me I wasn’t at all attractive.
*Took me to a work party–2nd date–where I was introduced as his wife. He did not correct the hostess.
*Told me I was overreacting after being stood up TWICE. (The overreacting was simply saying “no thank you” when asked for a third attempt at a date).
*It’s a long story. But it ends at Qdoba with him saying, “Do you want me to delete your number from my cell phone?” And me saying, “Yes. Now.”
And sure, most of these things could happen to any single girl, regardless of religion. I guess I just expect more from men who were raised with the same values and beliefs as I was.
So back to lunch: my friend pressed me for what I like in a guy–sense of humor, likes sports (believe it or not, I’ve never dated a guy who likes sports), nice, breathing…but I never mentioned religion.
Part of it is calling a bluff–people want to set me up all the time, but never do. But I think part of it is wanting to see if I’m treated any better by non-LDS guys.
Because as my LDS dating pool more and more resembles a cess pool, I can either keep combing through the cess, or I can try something new.